Beware Bridezilla!
by Cathy Baldwin
We've all seen it happen a bride gets so wrapped up in her wedding that she turns into someone even her fiance doesn't recognize. It starts out small maybe obsessing over the color of her bridesmaid's dresses or overanalyzing the seating chart and then it turns into a full-blown case of Bridezilla.
When the details start to get too overwhelming or a bride gets caught up in a fantasy of wedding perfection, it's a good idea to step back and get a little perspective on the situation. The wedding is never more important than the marriage.
After all, you chose the Outer Banks as the destination for your wedding why not choose the Outer Banks laid-back attitude, too? Heed the following advice, and maybe you can ward off the dreaded label "Bridezilla"!
Not every little thing matters. When you find yourself spending hours debating the color of your cocktail napkins and still can't make a decision, try to remember the last time you noticed the color of the cocktail napkins at someone else's wedding. Probably never. That being said, stop putting so much energy into details that won't
make a difference on the actual day. Your bridesmaids' nail polish does not all have to be the same color. No one will notice on your wedding day not even you.
Have a little faith. Your wedding planner/caterer/photographer has most likely serviced many weddings before you, and that is why you chose them in the first place. You've already signed a contract, seen photos or heard testimonials from other weddings they've worked, and
discussed the details of your event ad nauseum. Therefore, there's almost no reason to call or e-mail each vendor on a daily basis. And although your wedding is important to them, you should refrain from calling them at home or after business hours, unless they specifically say that's okay. They're in the business of making your day beautiful, so stop fretting and let them do their job!
Take a break from it all. Focusing so much on your big day can really wear a bride down. Take a day off from the stress. Book a spa appointment and enjoy a little self-pampering. Read a book, do a crossword puzzle or simply lace up your tennis shoes and get active. Anything as long as it's not wedding-related. Later that night, enjoy a date with your soon-to-be husband. And try as hard as you can to make it through dinner without mentioning the "W" word. He'll be grateful for a night that doesn't involve a rehashing of the guest list.
Keep it to yourself. No one wants to hear about your wedding 24/7. Sure, everyone is excited and happy for you, but enough already! Take time to listen to your friends talk about themselves and their lives without mentioning the wedding. Go shopping with your girlfriends, invite everyone over for a movie marathon, or take a girls' trip whatever, as long as it doesn't involve them catering to your every bridal whim! Your bridesmaids will be thankful to hang out with you just as pals and not as the bride and her maids. Focusing attention on others will help lift the stress and make you more focused on what's important about the wedding.
Follow the rules of etiquette. Just because you're getting married does not mean all of your guests should stroke you a check. It's tacky to demand gifts in any form, and especially tacky to ask for money from people you are inviting to your wedding. They're coming to your wedding to show their love and support, not to help fund your honeymoon cruise around the Greek Isles. Along the same lines, putting registry information on the invitation is a big no-no. It sends the Bridezilla message: "I don't care if you come to the wedding or not, but I want a gift anyway."
Be a gracious bride. Remember that old saying: "You catch more flies with honey than you do with vinegar"? The nicer you are to your wedding professionals, bridesmaids, mother-in law, et cetera, the easier and more stress-free planning your wedding will be. It's always courteous to smile and say thank you when someone helps you or goes out of their way. Right now everyone from your mother to the seamstress at the bridal shop is telling you, "It's all about you." Of course it is after all, you are the bride! But there's a big
difference between being a blushing bride and a belligerent Bridezilla.
Keep a positive attitude. Some-times things won't go as planned. You might realize that you're one bouquet too short or that a rainy day has forced your ceremony indoors. Remember that whatever happens, at the end of the day you'll still be married. Gale force winds or a torn hemline won't change that outcome. The only thing you can do when your wedding day throws a few curveballs is keep your chin up and enjoy the ride. Your husband and guests will follow your lead so make it a good one.
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