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In the Groom’s Corner
By Michelle Madden Smith
Although much of the pressure of the planning falls on the bride and her family, being a helpful groom will go a long way toward strengthening the bond you already have and will help take some of the pressure off your bride – ensuring you both can relax and have fun!
Make a Plan
First of all, you and your bride should mentally walk through the day and put together a detailed minute by minute plan, not only of what is happening when and where, but with details such as “give best man the rings”. Communicate your plan to groomsmen and the others enlisted to help out that day. And be sure to have backup plans in case things don’t go smoothly (especially if you are having an outdoor wedding). If you are delegating responsibilities, be as exact as possible about what you want and how you want it done.
Photographs
Look at family photographs together before the wedding in part to refresh your memory of distant cousins and relationships, but also to begin bringing one another into your families. This will help to give you both some clues to some of the folks you’ll be meeting.
Bachelor Party
Don’t plan the bachelor party too close to the wedding itself. You don’t want too much rehashing of all the craziness in front of the bride and her family. One ill-timed recollection that is funny to your college buddies could send someone from the bride’s side into a tailspin.
Gifts
Know where you are registered for gifts, because people will ask. Many guests, especially those that have traveled a long way, will choose to give you a cash gift instead. Make sure your tuxedo has an inner pocket to hold cards, and if not, enlist someone you trust to help you keep track of the envelopes.
Oops
If you are leaving home before the wedding, make sure a friend or trusty neighbor has a set of keys to your house. With so much on your mind it will be easy to forget something important. If someone can get in to your place, they can overnight it or bring it to you.
No Haircuts
Absolutely do not get a haircut the day of (or even the day before) the wedding. Your bride will be able to tell you what length she prefers your hair to help you figure out the best timing for your haircut. Two weeks before the big day is usually a safe bet. If at all possible, try not to go to someone who has never cut your hair before.
Making Points with the Bride
Although many couples cohabitate before marriage, many still honor the tradition of not seeing each other the night before the wedding. Have a groomsman deliver a small nosegay of flowers and a small gift with a love note to her in the morning. Tell her how much you love her and that you are looking forward to sharing your lives.
Have a friend prepare the room you and your bride will be staying in the night of your reception. If you have slept in the room previously, or used the room to get dressed, have a good friend get in there before you to make sure it is clean and tidy. Have him bring chilled champagne and glasses, and set up some candles and music. This sort of foresight goes a long way to gaining points.
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