Bridesmaids have long been part of the wedding pomp and circumstance. With some debate, the history of bridesmaids can be dated back to Biblical times when some brides were known to have their maids of the servant variety. Some people argue that bridesmaids began in ancient times when they would dress identically to the bride to confuse jealous suitors who wanted to kidnap the bride. Others say they may have stemmed from Queen Victoria at her 1840 wedding to Prince Albert, where she and her attendants all wore white. As time went on in the history of bridesmaids, the main goal of bridesmaid attire was not to outshine the bride. There is no debate, however, that the role of the bridesmaid is ever-changing.
Selecting your bridesmaids is something that shouldn’t be taken lightly. Take your time in deciding the who and the how many. Keep in mind that those you select will be forever attached to your special day in pictures, videos, and memories. Select those that will stand the friendship test of time and have them stand next to you on the most important day of your life.
Again, the roles and rules regarding bridesmaids are meant to be interpreted as you and your future spouse sees fit. There are no rules as to how many you need to have. Sometimes more minor is better.
Consider having one attendant for the bride and one for the groom. The smaller, more intimate wedding parties allow you to have one person with you as you get ready. They help with any issues or decisions that may arise on the big day and calm your nerves should you feel nervous before you walk down the aisle and say your vows. Having a smaller wedding party can give you more time and energy to focus on the big day!
©LORI DOUGLAS PHOTOGRAPHY
Some weddings can feel a bit cookie-cutter, but there are so many ways to make your wedding stand out from the others. For example, until recently, bridesmaids were expected to wear identical dresses that the bride selected. Instead, try letting your bridal party have a little bit of personality and choose their dress. This can help set your wedding apart.
Trends we love: One of our favorite trends for bridesmaids this year is allowing them to wear an outfit that makes them feel comfortable and shows off their unique style. From long gowns to cocktail dresses, jumpers, or pantsuits, your bridesmaids are going to love having a little bit of say-so in their wedding day attire. If you don’t want to give them free rein to pick their dress or outfit, perhaps you can select a few that you love, and each bridesmaid can choose from those options. In addition, some simple guidelines on color can be helpful to keep every outfit in line with your desired color scheme.
No one can price friendship, especially a long-lasting friendship, but being a bridesmaid often comes with a high price tag. So be sure to be upfront with your potential bridesmaids about the costs they can be expected to cover. In fact, according to etiquette expert Judith Martin, “Contrary to rumor, bridesmaids are not obliged to entertain in honor of the bride, nor to wear dresses they cannot afford.” So if you want them to purchase their dress and shoes and provide hair and makeup services, you need to tell them before they commit to standing by your side.
It may be helpful for your bridal party to get together to plan out a budget. But, of course, there are plenty of pre-wedding events that are sure to cost a pretty penny too. Bachelorette parties have become less of a one big night of fun and now tend to be weeklong destination parties. There are many factors to consider when you plan a destination bachelorette party. You may be asking your friends to take time off from work, pay their way, or even leave behind families for a week-long party. Other costs to consider are bridal showers and pre-wedding luncheons. If you’re expecting these things from your bridesmaids, be sure to communicate with everyone to plan something that works for all of the bride’s best girls! This will eliminate any stress or surprises closer to your big day.
©LORI DOUGLAS PHOTOGRAPHY
Trends we love: Incorporating your bachelorette party into your Outer Banks wedding is a great way to share a destination bachelorette party with your friends without breaking the bank or asking too much of your bridesmaids. State-of-the-art spas, sailing charters, and retail therapy are just a few of the fantastic ideas that can get you started on the best bachelorette party ever. OBX style!
Apart from cost, deciding on your bridesmaids’ specific roles and expectations is always helpful.
With the stress of wedding planning, you don’t want anything to come between you and a treasured friend. Communication is key! Every bride has a different idea of what her bridesmaids will be responsible for because each family is different. Some brides have parents, sisters, and family members who will swoop in to plan a bridal shower and care for all essential details. Often, a couple will plan the wedding and do a food and cake tasting on their own. Other brides may look to their bridesmaids for help with all of the planning, from visiting venues to dress shopping, creating favors, addressing and mailing invitations, and being a part of the planning process.
Of course, if a bridesmaid is going to be there for you on the biggest day of your life, you will want to offer a token of your thanks! A gift from the bride to each of her bridesmaids has become customary. Frequently these gifts are additions to jewelry that you would like your bridesmaids to wear during the wedding. You can even customize these gifts specifically to the Outer Banks by providing a new beach towel and flip-flops. The possibilities are endless but showing a few thanks to your beloved friend is always in good taste.